The thing about mom guilt is, well we all have it. Whether you are a young mom, single mom, working mom, stay at home mom, stepmom or whatever mom you are – we are all connected through the highs and lows of motherhood.
In reality a good mom has bad days and great days, normal days and overwhelming days, perfect days and trying days, supermom days and just being a mom days, a whole lot of love days and real crazy motherhood days.
I think this topic isn’t talked about as much as it is felt. At the end of each day I personally sit and reflect on all the ways I went wrong through my day as a mother. I let myself go down a rabbit hole of self doubt. I get so lost in these feelings that I forget all the beauty that also happened that day. All the laughs, smiles, and memories made together. So today; I want to reach out to all the moms out there who go through this and can’t seem to shake the feeling away. I am here to share with you 4 ways that help me lose the mom guilt that weighs me down at the end of my days.
1. No one can be a better mother for my children than I can
Say this to yourself out loud and feel how powerful this sentence sounds. This is very important to remind yourself when you are having major mom guilt. You and only you were made to mother your children. Nothing in the world can come close to the love and affection you provide for your babies. They count on you, confide in you, trust you more than anything on earth. Don’t take that away from yourself. You are exactly who your kids need.
2. I am an amazing mom, even as I work hard on becoming a better one
There are no rules to motherhood, you can be both a good mom and a flawed mom. Everyday you will learn something new about yourself and with that you apply it to becoming a better mom. Your kids don’t need a perfect mom but will appreciate a mom who strives to be a better one is some way. You are amazing even when you don’t feel it. Be gentle with yourself because you are doing the best you can.
3. The way I choose to parent is the best choice for my family
Remember when you found out you were pregnant and thought to yourself “how am I going to do this?” You did. Remember when you had a crying newborn and thought to yourself “how am I going to get through this?” You did. You made it through some of the toughest times as a parent and each time you thought you couldn’t do it but you did. You did this by choosing to parent how you felt is the best for your family. It doesn’t matter if its different from what you see others do, as long as you know that what you are doing will get you through. There are a million ways to be a good mom you are already making the best decisions for your family.
4. I forgive myself for my failures
This one is probably the toughest out of all the ways that help me ease mom guilt. Forgiving myself never comes easy because I feel so deeply that I have made too many mistakes as a mother. But that is wrong. Forgiving yourself is one of the greatest things you can do as a mother. Like I stated above; you are amazing WITH flaws. Once you are aware of your own flaws you can start to pick yourself up one piece at a time. Work on who you are and forgive yourself for anything you think you did “wrong.” Practice self care and know your worth. Don’t fall into a dark place over something that can easily be forgiven. Remember: little by little, a little becomes alot.
You will never have this day with your children again. Tomorrow they will be a little bit older than they were today. So while you are sitting there drowning in mom guilt try to talk yourself out of it by using some of the ways I shared. Take a deep breath, enjoy all the little things because today will be over before you know it. All your children really want is you.
You are mom enough.
Thank you for reading.